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Details
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Remember Me?
John is waiting for a bus, reading a newspaper. Harry walks up to him, holding a long leash, and we can’t see what it is tied to.
Harry Hey, John.
John Who, me?
Harry Yeah.
John Oh. Hi.
Pause.
Harry You don’t remember me, do you?
John Oh…of course…I…know…you’re…that…guy- no, sorry, no clue at all.
Harry No?
John No.
Harry You’re sure?
John I…I think so.
Harry A couple weeks ago? You were in line to a see a movie?
John A… movie?
Harry Yes, a series of still photographs rapidly passing in front of a light source, which shines them onto a screen to give the illusion of movement?
John I know what a movie is.
Harry But you still don’t remember?
John I….no…
Harry I was across the street….in the apartment building…nineteen floors up… watching you stealthily through high powered binoculars?
Pause.
John No, doesn’t ring a bell.
Harry I had a green-striped shirt on? No?
John Sorry.
Harry (to himself) Oh, what else, what else…um… (to John) I eventually got on a loudspeaker, screamed that you’re all slaves to a massive government conspiracy, shot a couple flare guns off, heaved some Molotov cocktails at the cops when they arrived, maybe the front page of every newspaper in the nation?
John I’m not much of current events guy.
Harry Oh, well, understandable…who’d want to read the paper these days, anyway? Ah, well…maybe you recognize me because… ah…I’m sleeping with your wife…I’ve sent you pictures of us in various sexual positions…
John (trying to think) Um…almost there…
Harry I broke into your house a couple months back, put my face on top of yours in all your family photos, spray painted ‘she’s mine, she’s mine’, all over your walls…
John (after thinking about this) Sorry, sorry…I just can’t put your face to all these things…I don’t know what it is…
Harry It’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve…ah…kidnapped your children, sent you a ransom note with a piece of your daughter’s ear, one of them is right here with me… (somehow reveal that he has a young girl tied up on a leash)
John (finally remembering) Oh! Steve!
Harry (correcting him) Harry.
John Harry! (shaking his hand) How are you, pal?
Harry Oh, good. Keeping busy.
John Great. That’s important, man. Devil finds work for idle hands, y’know…
Harry Yeah, well I just wanted to say hello. (to John’s Daughter) We’re just going to the fair down near the industrial park, aren’t we?
Daughter (quiet) Uh huh…
Harry See all the nice ponies…
John Well don’t let me stop you. It was good to see you, Steve-
Harry Harry.
John Right. Harry. Sorry. We should get a drink some time.
Harry (starting to walk off) Yeah, when my hands aren’t so full that might be nice…anyway, good to see you, John.
John Same to you. Have a good time at the fair.
Daughter (as she passes, to John) Daddy, my ear…
John (to Daughter) You can get them pierced when you’re twelve honey, okay? Don’t wander too far away…
Daughter (as she’s been dragged off) I can’t…
John watches her disappear benignly, and then goes back to his paper.
END
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Can you trust your animal instincts? | |||